at least he is willing to try!!!

Awwwh hunny, don't put it all on yourself!!! Think about it... you didn't do anything wrong. You were always there for him.. you did everything you possibly could for him. It's not you...... trust me... it's GUYS in general. Anyhoos I'm still in for tomorrow night, it'll likely be a sober one for me as well.. I think I'll just get drunk sat night instead. Hopefully I'll have similar luck this weekend that I had last weekend........... haha! A girl can always wish! <3 :)   But anyways we need a girly date soon! I was thinking we could use our gift certificates and go to Mexico* ;) 

LOVE YOU!!!!!! <3
toute ca bien aller, remember... "everything happens for a reason"

well i have jet black hair and what i noticed was that in the business world blondes are not taken for really serious and brunettes are always taken for being very very serious and stern. Redheads to me catch attention because its getting rarer by generation.

my body type- im petite and short. i usually cause attention i think because im short and i get treated like im too young or something. and one of my nicknames is "Shorty" and i think tall people are worshipped....lol 

good luck and let us know if u get the job or not!

what?? did you apply at La Senza and didn't tell me??!

Yeah.. "ami de sante" is good enough.. ahahaha

I really want the waxing to be tonight...we'll see what happens later when he calls, if not im going to text him

uhm...we have QUITE a few similarities :)

uhm....you wouldn't mind if I did some kind of comparison? lol. I'm a bit shy...but......well, I'm worried because of the purpose, or lack there of...

anyway....

1. well, yeah. I'm, not old enough to work, but I do like wearing corsets ^-^

2. I'm STILL that paranoid. yep, just a paranoid little girl :p

3. my family compliments my eyes- but It's my big sister's unique, bright Blue eyes that are the most beautiful. everyone says I have nice legs though :D although, I don't care what other people say- my personal favorite thing about myself is my odd personality :)

4. ....oh, god. this is emberrasing. omygosh, did I spell that right..? well, anyway, a friend a grade above me told me she had a crush on me...so, I felt bad for her, so I agreed to go out with her for a day. JUST a day!!!

5. when I was little...-er....some woman told me to drink some beer. I pretended to drink it, though I think I accidentaly did- because later on that night I was throwing up... o-0

6. I have weird eyebrows...? lol.

7. absolutely the same thing :p

8. EXACTLY.

9. I already know my biological father....my mom only met hers...I don't know. I think she saw him back in Cuba- although I recall meeting him once, here in Miami.

10. I don't like when people waste my time talking about unimportant things. its a waste of life. I also hate it when they interrupt me while I'm reading!!

11. well, my parents seperated when I was 8. and I THINK I have MPD :l....and just a TAD bit of OCD...and, as it runs though my fathers side of the family, A.D.D.

12. I tried to commit suicide when I was...9, was it? no one noticed though, because my mom was in the living room having a HUGE fight with my big sis- like always.but I'm smarter now, knowing life is to precious to throw away ^_^

13.hmm....I think the only guy I have ever loved (besides family) is my best friend's brother. he doesn't know that, though ;p but..I wonder if he likes me back to a certain extent...?

14. oh, definitely. I've gotten myself into a load of so much sh*t before, just because I can't say no -.-'

15. well, I'm more like Pheobe ^-^ (and from the guys- Ross!)

16. I'm not looking forward to 8th grade. I think. It's not like I don't want to, though. it'd be my last year in this school I grew up with. tonight is Graduation. I'm going to miss all those 8th graders I grew up with! especially my best friend's brother...though I feel guilty for saying that ^_^'

17. I'm afraid of commitment and I've never wanted to have children for when I'm older....becuase I want to be free as a bird- explore the world and study Art...and maybe become a writer ^_^

18. pfft- I know how you feel. I wish I could help my mom more with trying to handle me and my sister, and my grandmother with having us be her burden for the past 4 years that we've had to live in her house. we mught FINALLY get a house of our own, though...

19. I feel like my grandmother can make a grown man cry. she is one scary, old Cuban lady.

20. I still don't completely understand why my parents broke up, although I have an idea...something about since my dad cheated on his ex-wife, got my mom pregnant with my big sis, got married to my mom, then 6 years later I was born, and he had 4 children. to boys from his ex-wife who became me and my big sisters LOVING and CARING wonderful older brothers, but then...I THINK my dad may have cheated on my mom? I'm not sure. no one would tell me. they all say 'when you are older'. oh, PLEASE, I'm not that dense or immature JUST because of my young age.

21. .......hhmmm....I wouldn't know what It's like to lose those people, since I've never had them in the first place. besides, I was lucky enough to have an extraordinary father who would visit me WHENEVER he could...

I hope I didn't release TOO MUCH awkward information ^-^'....I apologize for being so blunt...you can ignore this if you want....goodbye!

~Yasu

wow..i neva said this to anybody thinking wat they wud think of me, but u noe wat..that truman show feeling that u had wen u were young..i still have that, i m being monitored always (even in the lu)!!

and also with ur confession no13. i can understand how it feels wen other guys come up to and tell u that u are lookin gd, or try being cute with u..even i like em..hehe..thou i also have a guy and can neva leave him..but still one tends to enjoy the compliments from other guys..hehe.. we gals are so wicked.. lolz

im so so sorry sweetie!! :(

**hugs**

take care!!

sorry about the miscarriage. Genetic defects are no one's fault, so tell him that.... just think of it as a sign that it is probably not time to have a baby yet.... maybe in a couple of months....

tell ryan no one is to blame, i can only imagine how guilty he might be feeling but it is no one's fault....

You seem very stressed do maybe just sit down and read a magazine it will make you feel loads better!!!

Cheesey xxx

p.s read my joke page on page 12 ok.

 My Prayers are with you xxxx

Best of luck pet 

Girl im so super sorry, its deff not gonna make it better but its all i can say ! My prayers are with you :D

That really SUCKS!!!!! my thoughts are with you...

**super huge hugs**

thats all i can really offer at a time like this.

and to let you know my thoughts are with you.

RIP little one... may you fly with the angels..

.. and then in a good few months, IN COMES THE STRETCHY PREGGO PANTS!!  hahah!

<3

Well, having a baby is a lot of responsability... (but you know taht alrady) your friend is just lookng after you, and the baby.... i work in hospital and let me tell you there are many parents here that wanted a baby but weren't ready for it... unfortunately it is not only about the love you are going to give your child... how can you give all your loe to a child if you have to also worry about expenses or if you have to worry about who is going to babysit while you work.... you can't.... so i understand your friennd's concern..... and i agree with you not keeping the baby is not an option.....

but donn't be to harsh on her.....

I think you should tell your friend that you are old enough to make your own decisions. My cousin wasn't happy either when she heard the news because she had a miscarriage in 2006. I am 6 months pregnant by the way. It was really unplanned. I am only 19 and I think I am a little young. I am mature for my age. I have held my job for almost 3 years now, I am in a stable relationship (Now married), I have health insurance, and I knew what to expect with this pregnancy. I don't make stupid decisions. I was real skeptical about having this baby. I didn't tell any of my friends until I was 20 weeks pregnant for fear of miscarriage. We have saved money for when I have to take off for maternity leave and he will be the one working. I am thankful I am a sensible person. I thought about abortion at first, but knew I would not do it. Its not like I was really trying to protect myself from pregnancy. I am still really worried about the financial obligation of having a baby. Did you know that babies can cost up to 10,000 a year? I just hope you are settled in a good job, that your relationship will last...how long have you been together? You just better make sure this guy isn't going to bail on you. It doesn't matter how excited he is now. You two really need to sit down and discuss the responsibilities this baby is going to put on you. You are still really early in your pregnancy, but this is a great convo to have now and later.

If I were you I would find a parenting class. You both should go. Even if its a one day class. Your gyn can't tell you every thing, and neither can the class. But the class has more time then your gyn does. You need to get to the doctor soon too so they can run lab work. Your 1st ultra sound will probably be at 8 weeks. I wish you the best of luck.

congrats!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Are you hoping for a boy or a girl?

congrats!!!!!

[Xblondeemollama]

Ahh Julz!! I understand you!! (even though I have never been in the same situation that you're in right now, I still understand where you're coming from and why you would feel like that). I believe that no matter what people think or say, you can't just move on that easily.. 5 years is a LOT. You can't just wake up one day and have forgot about those 5 years. It takes time..... Time is really the only thing! You should know that no matter what you still have friends around you that care and are always there, LIKE ME!

Anyhoos... I'm with you and hating what our exes have done to us!! MEN-ARG!!! lol!

love youus <3

oooh your birthday was soo much fun! haha! well for the few hours I was at the club with ya! :)

wait 'til I'm back in town.. we must go out!! M-U-S-T!
haha <3

JUUUULLZZZZZ! Guess who's back on my dear diary!! :)  haha soo I had totally forgot about this account..woops, my bad! SO I shall start posting again as of tomorrow! I'll be reading and commenting on your posts :):)

Can't wait til I'm back in town and we can go ooooouttttt! :)

<3 xox

i understand why you are so upset! you have the right to be upset.... but then maybe he has a good reason or maybe he doesn't... just wait and see what happens... don't rush into things and next time tell him " when you say you are going to call me, call me, and if you can't at least text me" tha should work.... maybe for him phone calls are not too important....

((((((((((((((((Julz)))))))))))))))))) Heart Hugs for your sadness and pain. I'm sorry that he is behaving this way- Must be so disappointing!

   I'm glad that you are taking a stand for yourself and for your happiness and the way that you should be treated! Please keep us posted.

   You are in my prayers and on my gratitude list!,

                       Jewel

  I hope that he will soon spend some time with you!

  I hope that you will have a good Thanksgiving! Any Plans?

  Thank YOU for the good wishes!

 Love,

  Jewel

that's a difficult situation...

on the one hand you are his significant other and as such you do have the right to make a certain amount of demands on his time but on the other...

his friends also have that right, and they have presumably been around for a while.  he's used to their company and they're used to his.  if you want to avoid some major conflicts then you'll have to somehow find a way to balance you're new (relatively...) relationship with respecting old lifestlyes...maybe by learning to enjoy time spent doing things he wants (not that I'm saying you don't!  I don't know) like spending time with his friends.  I also think you're entitled to some alone time though...

I don't know.  I'm sorry.  I want to be fair to you but I'm afraid I'm speaking too much from the perspective of one of those friends who feels left behind when their buddy gets into a new relationship.  I don't really know enough about the other side.  Sorry.

That is so awesome dude, i hope it all works out for you.

I don't think is low self-esteem i think is insecurity... that makes you go physical with guys so fast!

that happens with me even though i;m a pretty confident person.. when it's about guys i;m not so confident... and now that i thnk of it i do go physical with them fast (no sex though) and after that is basically over....

it is very brave of you to let the guy in,.. (meaning Ryan) ..... i'm scared of getting hurt too, i think that's also another reason for us to be ohysical fast... if we are physical is like you are putting a wall between you and the guy so you don't get psychologically involve with them and you won't get hurt....  now that i think of it, it is a defense mechanism...... so for you to get involve with ryan psychologically is good....

i need to get over that... i need to let some guys in... i guess the fear of getting hurt will always be there....

oh by the way THANKS for your comments....

well, it seems like ryan is your guy now!!!!! he seems nice... especially because he hasn't try to have sex with you that means he is not with you because he want to get laid! he is with you for real... and the fact he said "she is my gf" is really sweet! the jelous part is normal don't worry.... congrats for findig a good guy!

[Liana]

aww!! well congratulations :D

I agree completely, mom's make everything clearer. That book also rocks. My mom actually was the one who bought it for me, I guess she does know what she's talking about :) ohh and Ryan sounds like a great guy!
~calista

Difficult situation between trevor and ryan! I'd also feel bad... but you have to decide who youlike best... and go from there... yeah it's tru that with Trevor nothing was official but I don't think he'll be happy if he knew that you made out with ryan.... and you wouldn't be happy if trevor makes out with another girl! so if I were you I'd pick one and make sure that doesn't happen again... (yeah I know it's hard to not let it happen)...

as for Katie, maybe the "miscarriage" was just a way to draw attention to her... she should really LEAVE you alone! yeah the idea of a congratulations card is not bad... send it and maybe she'll get the sarcasm of it LOL ....

paul obviously doesn't know how to treat a woman... the good things is that he talks about you and he thinks he can get you whenever he wants to... and because that's not trur he ends up being the asswhole (pardon my language) ... an i think is funny that by your actions you make paul mad lol lol lol....

hopefully you hear from trevor soon!

thats amazing

i had wonderful night wiht a good guy as well

seems like we had one thing in common last night

luck

[sweetliljesusfan1985]

Fabulous night! since he might be moving away try not to get attached to him... that's the best thing... just have FUN! he is interested in you so that's something....

sorry for your friend Katie... miscarriages are always sad... but just remember everything happens for a reason...

in your same situation

hang on there and see where it goes k

((((((((((((((((((Julz))))))))))) I'm sorry for your heartache!  I think of you often and of all that you have been through since I've known you...It's been tough!  You WILL get through this in time...Hang in there!

   Love,

    Jewel

Thanks for the comment :D

Aww ya want a kid?? sh*ttt...I don't...ur very brave!! lol

i can't read that! :[

but thanks that was the best idea yet. i will try that. :]

(((((((((((((((Julz)))))))))))) I couldn't read that but am sending some love your way!

  Thank YOU for the note and for the faith in me!

   Much Love,

      Jewel

 first thing,Wasup with font. For the advice part, he probably wants be ur friend and have fun.Just peace out!!

((((((((((((Julz)))))))))))) Heart Hugs!  Sorry that you are still feeling hurt over the past...I don't think that you gave yourself enough time to fully grieve...sometimes we busy ourselves so much so that we don't have to really deal with it..and fill that sad and empty space with alcohol a nd men. I've been there!

    Thank YOU for the note and prayers- You're a doll!

    Much Love and many hugs,

            Jewel

the same thing happened to me....only no baby involved.. me and my ex broke up because of one of my ex bestfriends. they had been going behind my back.  i never really could trust her. but yeah my ex and his new "lover" are in a loveless relationship too.

everytime he passes me in the halls he sends out a sign. i hate him and her.

but yeah i guess i have found another guy. i don't know if he likes me though

anywayss...im new to my deardiary....sortaa so.... :]

  So glad that you are enjoying life! Thanks so much for the note of encouragement...

  Much Love,

     Jewel

 Glad to read that you had fun out with friends! 

   Thanks for the note and good wishes!

    Best wishes!,

      Jewel

why does it seem like i grew up a lot this summer??

:*:KeLsEy:*:

he seems so sweet like such a gentlemen! i like the sound of him.

I always have time for people in need! Lol! I don't exactly get the question.. but I think that Nathan likes you. It sounds really cute between you two and I think that you guys will hook up. Not sure what's going on with "D" but uhmmm he should have atleast acknowleged you haha. Uhmm good luck! haha

~V@!

yeahhh he sounds a bit of a dick
lol i got confused srry :(
welll i hopppee you get whictch ever lad you want hehe lol :)

nobody needs to be accepted by me. but i do belive in smart decisions....no u dont need to have a bf, a good job and a college degree.....just some sense in life. haha wtf

Well...sounds like you had SOME kinda fun this week LOL :D

Just saying!
-Meggie T.

Have a blessed day! Love you!

 I'm wondering what led up to dinner with the ex? Is he still with his girlfriend?

   Love,

    Jewel

lol....funny, same thing with me! lol

i dont whant A to know sum guys is interested on me, cas he might give up...
and...yea
one night stands suk!!
lol

take care!

Okay I'll leave you a comment, lol man I really wanna go to see such a show  haha i bet it was hilarious!!

And getting all that just in one night? haha wow..
Good luck sweetie..

Christina, xoxo.

well try not 2 get drunk n send text msgz of dat sought again

e nxt time dat u c him tell him dat u were just keddin around or smtin!!

tc n god bless u..

--hugzz--

Haha what is it with us and falling for guys at our other jobs? haha! Hope you get lots of attention from D tonight!! :)  Ooou.. so I went to my other job today with Mich and we saw BOB!!! :) :) :) He was such a sweetie! I'll tell you the little details later!

Toodloo! :)

Wow, you sound like me crushing n a guy.
I am totally like tha.Im 13
lol